Surviving Flanoir
by The Green Mage
Summary: Chapter 8 Complete : Sheloyd, spiders, bad cooking, and being flung through the air on fire.
1. Oops

Responding to reviewers from earlier:

**Lloyd (Irving) Aurion: **I don't know if I can do strictly Shelloyd, so I'm mixing it with some Gesea, and maybe 1 chapter of Kain

**Urby:** I fixed what you said, thanks for the tip.

**Crystal Tears:** Thanks for the review; I hoped it was humorous enough.

GM: Welcome to my 2nd fanfic, before I start, I'll warn you of the pairings: Kain (Kratos/Raine), Gesea (Genis/Presea), and Shelloyd (Sheena/Lloyd). And I replaced one of my muses because they killed my original character, so everybody meet my temporary muse, Kefka.

Kefka: Heheheheheheheheheheheheheh I will burn characters... and laugh while listening to their screams.

Anti: So now he has a sadist clown and his anti-conscious as his muses, video game characters, if you can hear me RUN!

Kefka: I'll do the disclaimer: Green Magi does not own Tales of Sympthonia, Namco, or Final Fantasy 6, or Square-Enix

GM: Okay, the story also has some parts of other movies like: _Monty Python and the Holy Grail_, but not until later.

Anti: It is a kinda, sorta, sequel to _Walking in the Ymir Forest_, it mentions it.

Kefka: Expect some characters getting bashed later when I take over the authors mind... and there will be a poll where you, the reviewer, decide whether a character lives or dies. Heheheheheheheheheheheheheh!

* * *

**It was a typical day in the tropic paradise, tourist at the beach, the carnival, and later on, the Casino. Today though, was a new day, for science and magic combined will conquer that of the power of the Summon Spirits, and the one who holds them.**

_In Altamaria, Lorenzo Company, George Office_

"Vice President George! Study from the lab has come back! We invented a substance that neutralizes power sir! SIR!" an intern was shouting at the poor Vice president, who at the time, was doing nothing, and getting paid a lot for it.

"What is your name?" George turned around and faced the poor intern, who was fresh from the Academy in Syback.

"Roger, sir. And it is necessary for a decision whether to test it or not, right now it would take away half our surplus, but if it worked, we would quadruple the highest profit the company has ever made!" The intern was excited now, he was hoping the VP would allow it, if it worked, then he would become an important executive, and get to sit and do nothing all day to.

"What is this invention Roger? And how exactly would it profit us?" George turned away on his swivel chair yet again. Not impressed, he used to be like the boy, always trying to increase the profits, but it had a horrible, terrible ending.

"It is like a weather machine, though instead of choosing weather, it takes away mana from machines and human and elf like beings, so they can't use any form of magic or special skills, for about 2-3 days. If it works, we could sell it to the king for half the treasury!" Roger replied. _He can't say no, it will work and I will get a huge promotion._

"No, it sounds like it wouldn't work." George answered, he thought it would work, but he didn't like the sound of the machine, it sounded like it would be used for war. War was 2nd on George's hate list, after paperwork.

"N-no sir? Well, I'll go and tell the engineers to stop working on it, don't touch anything while I'm gone" Roger than proceeded to leave, forgetting about his stuff which he brought in and had left on the desk.

"Crazy kids these days, trying to change the world for better. If something works, don't try and fix it, it will only blow up in your face." George muttered to himself. He then looked at what Roger had left on his desk, some wires, a stapler, cookbook (all workers are required by Regal to keep a cookbook with them at all times.), and a panel with a red button that said "push for test". _A red button, I haven't seen one of these for about nine years, since I accidentally signed Alicia up for Expshere testing. There were 2 sheets, one would sign someone up for exspere testing, and the other give someone a raise. In an unfortunate accident, he wrote "No" on raise and Alicia Combatir on exsphere testing. Then, he pushed the red button which sent them automatically to the front desk, where they were, sealed and sent._ So as you can tell, George enjoyed pushing buttons. He was debating whether or not to push it. _Must not push button, but instructions to clear, must push button, NO, yes, NO, instructions say push it so push it already!_ He then proceeded to push the button.

(5 Minutes later)

Roger came bursting into the office seemingly annoyed. But he wasn't just annoyed, he was on the limit of Berserk. "VP George! Did you push the button?"

"Yes I did, why, was it important?" George asked in a carefree tone.

"That button, just sent our prototype into action, over the Flanoir Mountains, where we aren't so we can't observe it! YOU JUST WASTED 30 BILLION GALD!" Roger was screaming, there went his job, he was indirectly responsible because he left the button out where anyone could get it. "WE CAN"T EVEN STOP IT BECAUSE I ALREADY ORDERED IT TO BE STOPPED, SO OF COURSE THEY START WITH THE PART THAT IS THE ONLY WAY OF STOPPING THE MACHINE!!!!"

"Take the 30 Billion from my paycheck, and I'm sure the effect will be over in a few days, take my advice, get-o-ver-it." George replied in his always calm manner.

**Somewhere above the Flanoir Mountains**

Lloyd and the gang were on there Rehairds, going to Flanoir to check Celsius' cave for Devil's Arms. It had been a few days since the Forest incident, and everyone was back to normal. They just kept Regal away from food, Lloyd away from meat, Colette away from fruit, and they didn't need to buy food every day. So, Lloyd carried the fruit, Colette the meat, and Regal carried spices. Zelos carried everything else. They were flying in pairs in case they crashed, Raine and Colette were flying first, followed by Genis and Presea, Zelos and Regal, and Lloyd and Sheena last. Suddenly, the sky turned a shade of orange, causing the Rehairds to lose power.

"Chance of survival if hit water, 6." Presea reported with just a hint of fear sneaking into her voice. "Advice to glide failing craft to nearest land," she didn't need to say so twice. The first 6 Rehairds made it, unfortunately for Sheena and Lloyd, they were too low to ascend the mountain.

"Sheena! We need to head for the Isle! It's our only chance!" Lloyd yelled over the sound you get from falling. Sheena, taking heed, moved her Rehaird toward the snow capped Isle. Just as they got there, all power broke and the landing gear malfunctioned, making the Rehairds crash into the cold ground.

* * *

Kefka: A cliff hanger, my idea! 

Anti: Right, and I suppose it was your idea to have them crash into the isle to

Kefka: YUP!

GM: Well, there is the first chapter, there will be more soon.

Anti: Tell us what you think

Kefka: Any of your comments or suggestions are welcome


	2. Wake Up and Repair

Responding to Reviewers:

**Lloyd (Irving) Aurion**: Thanks, I'll try to add fluff, and I'll read your story once it uploads.

**Dark drow**: I'll continue, but I don't think I'm a "great" writer, I just started...

Kefka: Second Chapter and only 2 reviews, sheesh GM, you must be sad

GM: No, I'll survive; most first chapters only get a few reviews.

Kefka: Optimist...

Anti: Do the disclaimer, or I'll send you back

Kefka: Fine, Mr. Good-side-is-more-evil-than-me, Disclaimer, Green Magi does not own Tales of Sympthonia, Namco, Final Fantasy 6, or Square Enix

GM: Okay, if anyone is wondering, I'm going to do the chapters by having Sheena & Lloyd's view on even, and then everyone else's on odds, with the exception of the first chapter.

Anti: Kratos/Raine fans, there is going to be only one chapter with that pairing mentioned, sorry.

GM: Now if anyone is wondering why most fictions center around Flanoir, it's because of all the snow, everybody loves snow.

Anti: Oh no, we got him started... Start the FIC!!!!

* * *

**A Few Hours Later from the Crash**

"Urgh, my head," Lloyd had just got up from his crash, with only a few bruises, and was about 20 feet from his smashed Rehaird. "I hope it has insurance, but where's...SHEENA!" For Sheena was nowhere to be seen, nor her Rehaird. So the search for Sheena was on, luckily there were few enemies on the isle, which were no match for the Eternal Swordsman.

**About 20 minutes later**

After exploring most of the isle, Lloyd had begun to give up hope on finding Sheena, the only other place to search was the coast, and if she was in the water... _Lloyd don't think that, Sheena can't be dead, she's just still out from the crash, yah that must be it._ As Lloyd approached the coast, his optimism was faltering to pessimism, which pointed out facts that Sheena was gone. _Sheena's dead and it's all your fault, you're the one who told her to go to the isle, maybe if you just flew to the mountain with the rest, none of this would happen and our summoner would_ _still be alive._ Fortunately, he caught sight of the Rehaird on the beach, not in the water. All the pessimistic thoughts were driven away as he ran toward the craft. He couldn't find Sheena among the crash. He looked toward the freezing ocean, and saw that an unconscious Sheena was there, perilously close to the killer water.

"Sheena! You're alive!" Lloyd shouted to no one in particular as he ran toward her. As he approached her fallen form, he saw that she had a few very nasty cuts. After moving her away from the water, he attempted to awaken her. "Sheena, wake up" and waving his hand over her face. "Hello, you need to awaken; we're stuck on an isle."

Sheena groggily opened her eyes, seeing blurred for a few moments, until coming into a more focused, but less blurry view. _What, a hand above me? Wait, it must be a threat!_ Sheena then, using her ninja techniques, quickly got up, tossed the owner of the hand to the ground, and had her card at the throat of the 'enemy'.

"O-okay, ss-so you're n-not a morning per-person, I won't wake you up again." Lloyd managed to stutter out.

"Lloyd!? What are you doing?" Sheena asked letting Lloyd go, who quickly moved out of her grasp.

"Well, I was trying to wake you up, because we're stuck on an Isle near Flanoir, and the Rehairds are busted." Lloyd hastily explained, rubbing his throat where Sheena's spell card had almost cut. "And we need to heal you, you're bleeding badly." For it was true that Sheena was bleeding worse because of the sudden movement.

"So it wasn't a dream... I can, summon Udine! She can heal us and take us to Flanoir!" Sheena then assumed summoning position, and started the chant "I summon the Maiden of the Mist, come Udine!" Nothing happened.

"Sheena, I neglected to mention that my sword techs haven't been working either, like the time I used the Demon Seal, except I'm not poisoned." Lloyd was trying to explain everything that happened in the time he searched for her. "Do you have any Gels? We need to heal you before it gets worse." He asked in a gentler tone.

"Phew, for a moment there I thought I had broken my pact somehow. Now lets see, gel, gel, nope." Sheena was relieved and worried at the same time, when a thought came to her. "That idiot Zelos must have used all the gels to make shampoo again! WHEN I GET BACK HE'S DEAD!!!!!!!!!" Sheena was yelling and strangling an invisible person with her hands, she really hated the red head now.

"Well we could try asking Origin, he must know something that's going on." Lloyd was going to use that telepath-like connection he had with the summon to ask. "Origin, what has happened?" Lloyd asked.

**_Keeper of the Eternal Sword and Master of the Pact, a new power has arisen that nullifies our magical powers, we cannot physically help, all I can do is offer advice, before going further, heal thineselves and thy vehicles, then attempt an escape. This is all I can give, I am sorry._**

"Sheena, do you think if we mash the apples and lemons, we can make gel?" Lloyd was coming up with a crazy idea. "We aren't very good at cooking fruit, that's mostly Colette's talent."

"I don't think it works that way Lloyd, I'll try to at least bandage my wounds, and you try to make Fruit Cocktail" Sheena replied, knowing full well that Lloyd wasn't that well at fruits. _So cold, I wish I had my Successor outfit._ _Why does Raine always carry everything? So unfair, going to freeze._

Lloyd went to try the fruit, as Sheena was thinking up ways to somehow have revenge on Raine, heal her arms, and not freeze to death.

Lloyd was mixing every type of fruit he could think of. He didn't care how some food tasted, at the beginning when he and Genis were exiled, he sometimes had to survive on Rabbit, or Falcon, and sometimes even Wolf. "Lets see, add, watermelon, fruit, kirima, and why not a cabbage?" Lloyd was mixing, something that could be dangerous. "Now some Lemon, and an orange, just to add flavor."

**(5 seconds later)**

**BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!**

The fruits exploded, leaving Lloyd with a red, orange, green, and yellow face, not very pretty, but it tasted good.

_Well that didn't work out to well, I might as well go and check on Sheena, and maybe I can convince her to try Penguist Roast._ Lloyd was shuddering at the very thought of the new food. Wiping off the fruit, he headed toward the area Sheena was located.

"This isn't working! Isn't ice supposed to stop blood flow?" Sheena was muttering angrily to herself, holding a snow clump on her arm.

"Hey Sheena, about the fruit... What are you doing?!" Lloyd asked her, shocked.

"I'm just stopping the blood flow with some snow, is that so bad?" Sheena responded looking at Lloyd like he was crazy.

"Sheena, you could get frostbite and lose your arm! Here, let me see the cuts." Lloyd asked of her, who puzzled, removed to snow and was staring at Lloyd. "Tie these around the cuts." Lloyd took out Flamberg and cut the white ribbons that are always trailing behind him. He then cut them a few times, and handed them to Sheena.

"Thanks Lloyd," Sheena tied them around the cuts, stopping the blood. "What do you have these for anyway?"

"I have no idea whatsoever. They were just always there." Lloyd responded. "Now, um the fruits kinda blew up, so if you wouldn't mind to Penguist Roast..."

"I'll cook the fruits, I don't think Penguist would taste good, they have so many feathers." Sheena replied.

"Okay, I'll fix the Rehairds!" Lloyd was happy that he got out of cooking, and he got to use his dwarvern skills to fix something. "They won't work, but at least they'll be able to go back to the mini-box thing."

**(A few hours later)**

"I fixed your Rehaird, now all I need to do is fix mine and we can put them back," Lloyd told Sheena over the fruit, he looked tired though.

"Don't wear yourself out, there isn't any hurry." Sheena replied looking at him. "If you wear yourself out, then we will be stuck here even longer." She tried to say like it was normal, but a hint of worry over Lloyd crept into her voice.

"I won't work myself to death, okay." Lloyd told her jokingly. Though it was suddenly very important to him that he made sure Sheena wasn't anxious or worried at all. "Let me help clean up, then you should go rest, you're injured and we can't heal it quickly like we could when we had Raine."

**(That Night)**

"I'm done with my Rehaird, now to put back into the M-box." Lloyd was tired; his Rehaird was in much worse shape than Sheena's. "There, now to get back to camp." Were Lloyd's last words before falling to sleep, standing.

"Lloyd! Are you done with the Rehaird, you need to sleep before... oh, he's already asleep." Sheena had come from camp to get Lloyd, only to find him asleep standing. "Come on, lets get you back to camp" Sheena dragged Lloyd back, and allowed him to rest against the rock which they were camping next to. (Remember Zelos is carrying the tent and stuff).

"No, I don't want to go to school today...project...evil teacher." Lloyd was muttering softly in his sleep.

_I'm going to freeze to death, how can I stop that from happening? _Suddenly an idea came to Sheena. She moved next to Lloyd, leaning her head on his shoulder. _I hope he doesn't wake up first, he may feel _(insert yawn) _awkward..._ Sheena then proceeded to fall asleep.

* * *

GM: There, Chapter is done! 

Kefka: Feel free to leave any questions, comments, or suggestions

Anti: Is that all you can say? Next chapter is from everybody else

GM: Don't expect Kratos/Raine for a while.


	3. Oh No

**Responding to Reviewers:**

**Lloyd (Irving) Aurion: **Well, you don't have to read them, but they will come together on an odd chapter. Just to let you know.

**Hikaru Irving: **Okay, happy almost birthday. I should have realized that you had 3 sisters. Sorry if you were offend or anything.

**Wyvern's Darkness:** Thanks for the review. Genis is the one you get to vote on dieing or not, at the end of the chapter.

GM: This happens the same time as the first chapter

Anti: I'll do the **disclaimer: Green Magi does not own Namco, Tales of Sympthonia, Final Fantasy 6 or 4, or Square Enix, or Monty Python and the Holy Grail**

Zemus (New muse from FF4): My defeat grows nigh

Kefka: GET OVER IT! I've been killed at least 20 times by the video game obsessed author, and you don't see me complaining!

GM: If anyone wants to know why Lloyd might feel awkward, tell me, how would you feel if a girl you had no idea like you had her head on your shoulder after falling asleep standing up.

Zemus: This is going to be boring.

Anti&Kefka&GM: WHAT!

Zemus: They're just waking up and trying to get to Flanoir.

Anti: No, there is also the appearance of the Wonder Chef

Zemus: Exactly, boring.

Kefka: HEY! I'M THE ONLY VILLAN MUSE ALLOWED TO INSULT THE AUTHOR!

GM: See what I have to put up with...

**

* * *

**

**At the site of the crashed Rehairds **

The Rehairds crashed into the ground knocking most of the riders forward. The 1 that stayed on was Raine, who, because of her fear of water, tied herself to the Rehaird each time. Regal was covered in a snow mound, Colette was hovering above the ground inspecting the damage, Zelos was trying to stand up so he could go and 'help' Raine, Genis and Presea were up, trying to pull Regal out of the mound.

"Regal, you could help!" Genis was unsuccessfully attempting to pull Regal from the snow.

"Uff inglay hed ardma cat muhvay" A muffled reply came from Regal. No one knew what he was talking about, it wouldn't be important anyway.

"160 output should be sufficient." came from Presea, in her monotone voice, who was also pulling Regal out.

"Whine! (Sheesh, do I have to do everything around here? Just dig him out!)" Came from Noishe, who then, went to the top of the mound and started digging, releasing Regal in a manner of seconds.

"ZELOS! LET ME GO!" Raine was roaring at Zelos, who was holding her in his arms.

"Oh my Glamorous Beauty, you know how much you've wanted this..." SLAP! "Urgh," Was the reply from Zelos after Raine had slapped him.

"Our Rehairds don't seem too damaged; they just need a tune up." Came the ever optimistic report from Colette. Her face then turned to sadness, "I'm more worried about Lloyd & Sheena".

The party stopped at this, no one had even given thought unto that. They didn't even know if Lloyd and Sheena were alive.

"Poor Lloyd, he even took the blame when I was looking at the girls" Zelos absentmindedly remarked.

"What?!" Raine asked, curiously.

"At the Hot Springs, he saw me watching you, then tried to stop me instead alerting you girls while I ran away." It took a few seconds for Zelos to register what he just admitted. _Uh oh, this isn't good, must run away_

"See, I told you Lloyd would never do that!" Colette cheerily said.

"So you just let Lloyd take the blame?!" Raine was outraged, she should have known Zelos would have tied into it.

"I'll see you all in Flanoir. Heh heh." Zelos said nervously before he ran straight toward the City of Frost, unfortunately running into Noishe.

"HOWL!" Noishe looked like he was going to attack Zelos, who ran back into Raine, knocking her down.

"Hey Raine, we can put this aside us right? We don't need to get violent, it was just one silly mistake, it won't happen agai OW!" Zelos was able to plead part of his case before Raine whacked him with her staff, again and again and again and again. By the time she was done beating up Zelos, he was unconscious.

"How will we carry the Rehairds to Flanoir? We need to repair them quickly if we're going to find Lloyd and Sheena." Regal said (2 sentences at once, must be a record).

"Well, if you take the weight of the Rehaird to be 70 Kg, and the distance to be about 3 Kilometers, we should be able to drag them there." Genis was calculating in his head again. "Noishe and I could probably drag one, Regal should be able to take one himself, Colette and Presea can take to each because the Crystals empower them, and Raine can revive Zelos."

"Colette, can you carry them and fly at the same time?" Presea was asking, a most random question now of all times.

"Of course Presea, I love flying! And besides, I don't know if I want to be on the ground if there are monsters" Colette shuddered. She wasn't on good terms with the monsters since that day...

(Flashback)

"_Come on guys" Lloyd was excited, they were going to Flanoir, and there wasn't that much snow in Iselia._

"_Lloyd, you get bored too easily" Genis complained._

"_Shut it Genis." Lloyd warned his best friend._

"_Wait for me... Aah!" Colette had tripped, slid down an icy slope into a pit of ice spiders. She was Paranoid of spiders; fortunately Sheena summoned Efreet and burned all the nasty spiders away. _

(End Flashback)

Sure Sheena had destroyed the spiders, but still, Colette was terrified of them.

"That's why Raine and Zelos get to fight off the monsters, because I didn't assign them any Rehairds." Genis told Colette, exasperated. _They'll see what happens when they don't listen to me, somebody gets hurt. Hopefully Zelos._

"Resurrection" Raine was saying the spell half heartedly over Zelos.

"Hunny, I knew you'd do that, you just can't resist me can you?" Zelos asked Raine while slowly backing away as not to get hit.

"Come on, lets hurry" something was wrong with Raine, she wasn't her usual over-oppressive older sister/teacher self.

**In Flanoir   
**

"Phew... That was tough." Genis remarked gasping for breath, he wasn't used to moving that much weight.

"We should get out of these clothes before we freeze" Regal said, he wasn't tired though, just freezing.

"As much as I hate the brat, he does have a point. Oh Glamorous Beauty, will you please hand me my masked swordsman costume." Zelos asked Raine. "I don't want to freeze my wonderful self, it would be a waste."

"Sure thing, unfortunately some of the outfits are covered in snow, so this is what's left. Genis, you get your Katz outfit, Presea, you have your Klona costume, Colette, here's your waitress uniform, Zelos, your Mask, Regal, here's your Chef Suit, and that leaves me with...Oh no." Raine was so busy handing out the outfits that she didn't notice both her Maiden costume and Party outfit were ruined, that left her with the Bunny outfit from Altamaria. (A/N: My friend said in the PS2 version, Raine gets an extra costume, one of the Bunny Suits from Altamaria)

"I'll go get 3 rooms Professor. "Colette was about to go into the inn.

"Why do we need 3 rooms? We should only require 2." Presea asked puzzled.

"Well we can't leave Noishe out here to freeze, can we?" Colette responded, then going to get the rooms.

**After everyone is changed   
**

"Hey Presea, do you want to go build snowmen?" Genis asked Presea, without stuttering this time.

"There is no time for 'fun' now. We need to concentrate on fixing the Rehairds and locating Sheena and Lloyd." Presea responded monotone to Genis request.

"I'll help you Genis! But first I'm going to visit the temple of Martel; I want to see it while I have time." Colette loved playing outside; she never got to in Iselia.

"No, that's okay Colette, I'll just go and uh" Genis was unsure of what to say next, "intake the scenery?"

"I'm going to go and study the Ice Statues, because they will never melt, they will one day !" Raine went of into Archeology Mania.

"Okay, that was disturbing, but Sebastian thinks my Mansion needs a shrubbery, no idea why. So after purchasing one of those, I'm going to 'meet' some of the locals." Zelos announced before leaving with haste.

After everyone other than Regal and Presea had left, Regal decided he was going to buy a cookbook, it was a special deal, and it came with a herring, the perfect tool for cutting down trees.

"I'm going to go shopping, I suggest you don't stay here alone, you should go find Raine, she's the most responsib... Never mind, just go find someone so you aren't alone, I heard around here, people say the word... Ni." Regal advised Presea, saying the last word so softly, it was almost not heard. And with that he left.

"I'll go see Genis then, he seemed lonely." Presea said out loud to no one in particular.

**   
Temple of Martel**

"Hey, is there supposed to be a bowl in a church? I think not." Colette was finished talking to the priest about Martel, and was investigating the beauty of the church itself. She reached the bowl, and out came... a blow up doll of the Wonder Chef.

"Thank you for finding Wonder Chef, we care about your cooking ability. The Wonder Chef will be with you as soon as he is done out cooking the Dark Chef's. Thank You." The doll said in an automatic recorded voice.

"Wow! I found the Wonder Chef! It's normally Regal, so today must be my lucky day! I'll wait as long as possible!" She was talking in a hushed voice; it was a church after all.

**   
Top Most part of Flanoir**

Genis was standing above the city on the balcony. He had heard about it from Lloyd, who apparently talked to Sheena here. Genis was staring at the city, it was a site. The lights contrasting the snow. _Presea, why don't you pay any attention to me? I just want you to like me. _Thoughts such as this were in Genis head, he was paying so much attention to them that he didn't notice the shadowy figure behind him.

_Well, Genis wants to play in the snow, so we'll have a snowball fight. _Presea couldn't just stay at the inn and do nothing, so why not a snowball fight? She picked up some snow, turned it into a ball and threw it. Of course she didn't know her own strength, because when Genis got hit and the impact flung him over the rail.

He didn't fall, but hit a stone outlaying where a gargoyle once stood. "Aaaaahhh" Genis managed to get out weakly before falling of the stone placement.

* * *

GM: Chapter done. 

Zemus: Well, to spice things up, here is where the reviewer takes over, **Does Genis live or die**

Anti: Oh come on, we already had him hit off a rail, we can't be that bad

Kefka: You're right, I SAY WE FEED HIM TO A PLANT

GM: My muses are evil, I'm sorry

Anti: Anyway, next chapter is Sheena and Lloyd


	4. Dwarves

**Responding to Reviewers:**

**Lloyd (Irving) Aurion: **Well, thanks for the support, there will be about 3 more chapters, maybe more.

**CrystalTears: **Well, it has something to do with Zelos, but that's in the next chapter, Presea won't save him

**Doomguard21:** Here's the Shelloyd, there will be an angry mob, but not about what you think...

**Mizu:** My first threatening review, wow. Genis will Live, so I can write a nice tragic, angst, alternate ending...

**Rosa-Le-Fay**: Presea will unfortunately, not save him. But, I'll include more Gesea when Genis finally wakes up.

Kefka: So Genis will live, for now.

Zemus: Pessimist.

Kefka: Why I should...

Anti: No magic allowed on the first page

Zemus: This is unfair; I want to destroy that little clown...

Anti: Fine, I'LL do the disclaimer; **Green Magi does not own Tales of Sympthonia, Namco, Final Fantasy 4 or 6, or Square Enix.**

Raine: Where is my chapter with Kratos? You already forced me to wear that stupid Bunny outfit.

GM: No characters that you didn't fight in the game allowed as muses, so that leaves, Sheena and Kratos and Zelos.

Raine: No fair, now tell me or I'll be...Teacher-like

GM: Somebody get her out of here!

Minion: Come on lady, you aren't allowed here.

Raine: INJUSTICE! (Gets dragged away by 2 minions)

Zemus: Next chapter will contain the only Kraine, and it is pretty much just how Raine feels about Kratos 

GM: Anyway, this is Shelloyd, and a flashback

Anti: Self-insertion isn't a good thing you know

GM: How So?

* * *

_Still tired, need more sleep...WAIT!_ Lloyd noticed Sheena was next to him, asleep. His heart skipped a beat. She looked cold, she was turning blue. _Now where did I learn that turning blue was bad for you? Hmm, maybe from Raine, no, she never taught anything useful. _Lloyd thought about this while Sheena continued freezing.

(Flashback)

"_Lloyd, it is your turn for the book report. Please present it to the class." Raine was a new teacher that year, and did not reveal that she was a crazy archeologist yet._

"_Yes Professor Raine," Lloyd walked up to the front of the class with his book, and started his report. "My book is Totally Random Facts that Don't Seem to Help but Do, written by an author that calls himself Green Magi..."_

"_Do you know what that is called? When an author doesn't use their real name?" Raine interrupted, she could turn anything into a lesson._

"_Um, a pen name?" Lloyd took a guess as Raine gave an exasperated sigh, so Lloyd continued. "It contains facts about the weather, elves, books, quotes, and stuff like things you need to know on freezing tundra" soon, Lloyd was done and was taking questions. _

"_Why would we need to know something about freezing tundra? There is no snow capped mountains on the map." Jeeves, the new student said._

"_In case there is ever an Ice Age" Lloyd replied if it was the most obvious things in the world._

"_What types of things do you need to know about if you're on freezing tundra? You only told us the chapters." Jeeves, yet again, asked._

"_Stuff like: what to do if a person is turning blue, or why you shouldn't put snow on a cut, and a few basic recipes if you're out of food." Lloyd answered the question._

(End Flashback)

Lloyd was just regaining his sense back from the flashback, when he decided, that, although it may be bad for his health, he had to wake Sheena up.

"Sheena, you need to wake up, if your blood freezes you die and you can tell that because you are turning blue..." Lloyd was trying to wake Sheena up with his left arm, she was leaning on the right, and though he wanted her up, he didn't want her to hit the ground.

"Lloyd..." Sheena murmured half-asleep and embraced him, causing Lloyd's face to turn to the color of Red Satay.

He didn't want to wake her up more than ever now, but he had to if she wanted to not be a Sheenasicle. He tried again, and this time, she woke up.

"Lloyd! I'm...I didn't..." Sheena was at a loss of words as her face blushed past red and to purple. She quickly moved away from Lloyd more embarrassed than ever. _Great, he woke up first. I need to carry a good luck charm, oh well, what is done, is done._ Before she could speak, Lloyd spoke.

"Sheena, we'd better concentrate on finding a way back, we are almost out of food, so unless you want to try Penguist Roast..." Lloyd again didn't even want to think about that food.

"I don't think that would taste very good" Sheena responded to Lloyd, the blush slowly fading.

"So, should we check the coast, or try to climb the mountain?" Lloyd asked her, even though she was never here before, she still had a much better sense of direction.

"We should climb the mountain, if one of us slips and falls into the water, and then they would freeze to death, or at the very least, catch pneumonia." Sheena replied, going back into character. "I'll race you to the top" and with that, she started running toward the mountain.

"Huh, wait, no cheating!" Lloyd ran after her shouting. Lloyd was faster than Sheena, but she had a head start. _Well, the book said that exercise caused blood to move faster to carry more oxygen, so now she should un-turn to blue._ He ran faster, he wasn't just going to let her win, now, was he?

**At the Top of the Mountain**

"I can't believe you" Sheena stopped to take a breath, "beat me." She was no longer blue, but it now looked like she might collapse from exhaustion.

"Well, I do run fast." Lloyd was also tired, but not nearly as much as Sheena. "Now there is usually some hidden trap door or cave. Help me search." Lloyd started searching.

"Why would you say that? Have you been stuck on an isle before?" Sheena was puzzled, where did Lloyd get the idea that there is always some secret everywhere.

"No, I haven't been stuck on an isle before, but I have been stuck in places like the Sylverant Renegade Prison, and Derris Kharlan, and there was always something that allowed me to escape." Lloyd reasoned reasonably.

"Well, you do have a point." Sheena sighed, "Maybe over here..." She started to walk toward a suspicious looking stump. "Lloyd, are you coming or not?"

"Sheesh, I'm coming, I just thought I saw something..." Lloyd answered; he had seen a glint of something near the ground.

"If it was something important, it wouldn't have been dropped." Sheena was about to turn and start searching on her own when she saw it to. "Well, we might as well find out what it is." Sheena and Lloyd walked toward it, and when they came close to it, a hole opened up underneath them, and they fell.

And kept falling,

And falling,

And falling,

And falling,

And falling,

And falling,

And falling,

And falling,

And falling,

And falling,

And falling,

And falling,

And falling,

And falling,

And falling until finally hitting the ground.

"Ow, that hurt. We need a light; it is pitch black down here." Lloyd's muffled voice was able to speak. "The Sorcerer's Ring should do it..." and the flame lit a conveniently placed torch which was only a few feet away from Lloyd.

"AHH! LLOYD YOU SET ME ON FIRE!!!!!!!" Sheena shouted, the torch was next to Sheena so as the torch was on fire, so was she. After running around a bit, Lloyd squashed a few lemons that were left from the food supply and threw them on Sheena.

"There, lemon juice should put it out." Lloyd said confidently as Sheena was no longer on fire.

"Lloyd, you have to be more careful. You could hurt somebody." Sheena scolded Lloyd. "And if you accidentally used Kirima fruit, the fire would have been bigger" (A/N: In this fic, Kirima fruit is flammable)

"Where are we? This place seems familiar somehow..." Lloyd stated, observing his surroundings.

"What? I've never been anywhere like this, and I'm Tetheallen, so how would you know?" Sheena asked Lloyd, who was using the torch to observe the cavern which they had dropped into.

"I think... this is a Dwarven Tunnel." Lloyd stated after a few moments which seemed like an eternity.

* * *

GM: Done!

Kefka: Hahahahahahahahaha you burned Sheena.

Lloyd: Hey, it wasn't like I could see her!

Minion: What are all these characters doing? You get out of here, NOW!

Zemus: Not very much humor in this one

Anti: Well not all chapters need humor.

GM: Okay, leave any suggestions or comments that you wish.


	5. Danger of Shampoo

**Responding to Reviewers:**

**Lloyd (Irving) Aurion: **Sorry the last chapter confused you. I should have been more descriptive. I don't want to be over-descriptive and make it boring. & my sister had stolen my floppy disk so I wanted it up before she took it again, she is _evil_.

**CrystalTears: **The Sheena & Lloyd chapters are hard to add humor into; they're the more romance part of the story. To have a good humor story, you need Raine, Zelos, or Genis. The basher, and 2 bashees. I hope this makes up for it...

**Mizu:** You thought the last chapter was good? Really? I thought it was lacking in its humor potential.

**Wordsbecoming:** Well, you asked for Monty Python...

GM: The last chapter was, by far, the hardest to type, that's why it wasn't exactly my best work

Kefka: Why are you updating so early?! There isn't a deadline you know!

Anti: Actually there is, midnight a.k.a. Sunday 12 AM.

Zemus: The last chapter was horrible; you have to take more time.

GM: Quite! I need to get this chapter up before Midnight and if you don't help then you can leave.

Zemus: Fine, here's the **disclaimer: Green Magi does not own Tales of Sympthonia, Namco, Final Fantasy 6 or 4. He also doesn't own the parts that are underlined. Nor Monty Python and the Holy Grail.**

Anti: Yes, this is the chapter with Kraine reference

GM: After this the next chapter should be Wednesday, because Sunday-Tuesday is Read-only.

Kefka: I'll get a break from muse duties.

GM: It starts with the Kratos Raine part, so if you want to skip it, go ahead

* * *

Raine was standing alone near the Ice Statues, the stars were bright out that night, and it was perfect if you just wanted to count them. She came to study the Ice to make records for future generations but, as she looked at the stars, she began thinking of Kratos. She remembered back in Izlood, where he advised Colette to gaze at the stars because she couldn't sleep. She started to find it hard to concentrate on her research, which, for her at least, was miraculous. She started pacing around the frost covered ground, when hail started to fall, unusual for Flanoir. She sighed as she was covered by the hail; things always went wrong for her. She wished she could have Colette's undaunted optimism, not her pessimist and realist views on everything. She needed to do something, anything to get out of the cavernous depth of her mind. 

_There must be something I can do, anything at all. I can't seem to concentrate on anything, what to do...what to do... _Then it hit her, she had found an ancient song in one of her many archeological hunts. It described almost exactly what she was going through. It seemed out of place amongst there, it was in what seemed to be a castle, but it was now doubted from the appearance of dragon bones and steel beams. She remembered every word from it, it touched her heart, and it must have been a great composer to have written that. She was going to sing, something she hadn't done since she had to take care of Genis as a baby.

"Oh my hero, so far away now, will I ever see your smile?" She sang as she moved toward the statue called Pac-Man. "Love goes away, like night into day. It's just a faded dream..." She moved toward the next statue, narrowly avoiding a slippery spot which would have ruined everything. "My love for you is brighter than the sun." She sang softly so only if a person was a few feet away they would be able to hear her. Her voice was calm and serene, as though she sang everyday instead of rarely. "For an eternity for me, there can be, only you, my chosen one." She started moving away from the statues of ice, toward the town square, singing with her soft voice her head up to the stars. "Must I forget you? Our solemn promise? Will autumn take the place of spring?" She was now in the square not noticing that Zelos was near a cauldron toward the corner."What shall I do? I'm lost without you, speak to me once more!" As she finished the aged song, Zelos decided to make his appearance.

"Oh Raine my beautiful hunny, I knew you'd come around!" Zelos said in a singsong voice. He then stepped away from his cauldron and kissed Raine, then stepping back a bit, to see how she'd react.

"Zelos," Raine started calmly, "today you...DIE!" Raine grabbed her bag of notes, which weighed about oh say, 36 Kilograms, and then started to beat Zelos.

"Oh dear go-ack! Please Raine be...NOT THE HAIR" Zelos was shouting as Raine started beating Zelos on the head.

**Back to Genis**

"GENIS NO!" Presea ran toward the balcony, too late as it was. Genis fell right out of her grasp. She looked down and to her utter dismay; Genis was going to crash right in front of Raine. "I'm sorry Genis..." Presea murmured as the town bell rang and she went down the stairs.

Genis, on the other hand, had no idea what was going on at all. The stone had put him into a daze, so even if he was athletic, he wouldn't have been able to get out of what was coming.

SPLASH!!

Genis hit Zelos cauldron, which was Zelos' patented hair shampoo. He was mixing it in hopes of making a new business partner in Flanoir, even though the attempt was futile. At the contact of the pink shampoo (the same color as Zelos hair) Genis awoke from his daze.

"Help! I'm melting!" Genis shouted as Raine stopped beating up Zelos to look at her pink covered brother.

"No interrupting your elders" Raine instructed, pushed Genis back into the pink ooze and continued beating up Zelos.

"Raine, can I-ugh- have a time out?" Zelos asked with both his eyes black and limping on his right leg. "You see...STOP IT! YOUR BROTHER IS GOING TO DIE AND YOU AREN'T PAYING ATTENTION!" for it was, that in Raine's continued beating, that she didn't see that there was a fine print on bottle of already made Shampoo, which was on the previously unnoticed wooden stand next to the cauldron. The fine print said "Not intended for non-human usage".

"WHAT! Genis, get out!" Raine temporarily stopped beating Zelos to shout at her brother, who made no response.

"It's to late, the shampoo solidification has already begun, the only way to get him out would be to a)cover him in water, which would cover him in ice and give him pneumonia, or b)try to pull him out of the shampoo." He said as Raine tried to get Genis out, to no avail. When suddenly, Presea came running from the direction of the inn.

"What happened? I um...saw Genis fall, is he okay?" Presea asked the 2 adults, who were watching the shampoo solidify more.

"Genis is...is... stuck in the cauldron." Raine stuttered, for one of the few times in her life. "Can...you pull him out? Please?" Raine had a look of desperation on her face, which few people had seen before. _He's all I have left..._

"Of course," Presea stated as she pulled Genis hand, which was out of the shampoo, like when people fall into quick-sand. She was able to get him out, but he was unconscious from lack of oxygen. _Genis, you're okay, I'm sorry I did this to you_.

"What is the antidote? You said he was poisoned." Raine was starting to regain her composure. She faced Zelos, "Well? Hurry, unless of course you want to incur my wrath..."

"No, I don't want to incur any wrath... Here, the blue bottle..." Zelos grabbed the shampoo bottle that was behind the pink one. "All he needs is some conditioner, and there, no longer poisoned." Even beaten up, Zelos was still the most annoying guy ever.

"Let's get him back to the inn he'd recover faster... I mean, recovery would be increased at inn." Presea corrected herself, she had almost showed emotion, and luckily she was able to mask it. She was holding Genis, who looked like a pink piece of gum.

"Nobody moves." A male voice rings out from the side, "We need to get rid of the Red-head. It's Angry Mob day, so we can exile people today." And it was, for many people were holding torches and pitchforks. "A number of citizens complained about you, as well as the shop keeper."

"You can't exile me! I'm the Chosen, if you don't recognize me." Zelos said haughtily, the Chosen was above things such as exiles. "How about you exile that swallow, it brings foreign objects to the village." He suggested, trying to weasel himself out of another trouble.

"Flanoirian swallows are non-migratory, and they can't carry anything anyway, they are only 7 ounces." A random villager interrupted.

"Well, how do we know it's a Flanoirian swallow, all swallows look alike." Another villager interrupted the first villager.

"Yes, well even if it wasn't a Flanoirian, it wouldn't be able to carry anything. Non-Flanoirian swallows are only 5-ounces" The first villager stated his argument, putting down his torch.

"Well what about 2 swallows" The second villager debated.

"Okay, now we sneak away..." Zelos whispered to Raine and Presea. "Come on, while they're occupied." And they snuck back to the inn, where they put Genis in the 3rd room they had rented, because the girls weren't allowed in the guys room, and vice-versa.

**Colette**

"Getting tired, how long does cooking take?" The only people that were in the church now were herself, the blowup doll, and the pastor.

The elevator music finally stopped, and the Wonder Chef appeared, in all his culinary glory.

"You look like you could make a great chef; I give you the recipe of-Gack!" The Wonder Chef started, only to be strangled by Colette.

"You can't make people wait forever for one recipe" Colette whispered fiercely. She allowed the Chef to sit down, no longer strangling him. "Now, we are going to have a long talk about politeness and why everyone should have it." Colette smiled, "Ok?"

"Oh dear, this can't be good..." The Wonder Chef muttered, fortunately Colette didn't hear.

* * *

GM: Phew, 2 chapters one day, I need a break... 

Kefka: So Genis wasn't eaten, oh well.

Anti: You know what to do

Zemus: Leave any question, comments, or suggestions.

GM: See you on Wednesday, goodbye.


	6. Out of the Cave, into the Snow

Bane: And we are back, after the break.

Anti: Now this chapter isn't going to contain much humor, it is Sheena Lloyd part.

GM: I promise to put lots of humor in the next chapter, okay.

Bane: I'll do the **disclaimer, Green Magi does not own Tales of Sympthonia, or Namco**

GM: I'll make this chapter more detailed, because the last even chapter may have confused some people.

* * *

"What? A dwarven tunnel, how would you know that?" Sheena asked Lloyd, looking confused.

"Well, I was raised by a dwarf, so you get to know these things." Lloyd said. "But I do have a feeling that something's not right, like when you know something's wrong."

"You mean besides the fact that we can't use any type of magic, stuck in a cave, and out of food?" Sheena said sarcastically, taking the torch from Lloyd and lighting a torch on the wall which lit up the other torches that were lined up on the wall, therefore illuminating the entire room.

Deciding to ignore that last comment, Lloyd observed his surroundings in awe, there were stone pillars lined up on either side, the floor was made of marble, the walls out of another material which had a bluish glow, and piles of materials next to them, (dwarves aren't exactly the neatest creatures). "Wow, Sheena, look at this craftwork, it must have taken centuries to build. All the effort that must have gone in to this…" Lloyd stepped forward and as he did, stalactites from the ceiling fell toward him, fortunately he dodged them, just barely though, the rock had nearly gone through his arm.

"Lloyd! Are you okay!?" Sheena moved immediately next to Lloyd, who was acting like a statue, not moving at all.

"Sheena, I think this might be from the remains of Dark Elf/Dwarf war. This would explain the traps…" Lloyd said, while Sheena was shocked that Lloyd actually knew something about history. _I wonder why she's staring at me…_

"Lloyd, how did you know…What do you mean…I would expect this from Raine because she's Ruin Crazed, but you?" Sheena stuttered out a sentence, still amazed that Lloyd knew something from the past.

"Well when you live with a Dwarf, you have to memorize significant Dwarven events." Lloyd explained to Sheena, as if it was obvious. He glanced around the room, looking for more possible traps.

"Now I know you're lying," Sheena couldn't believe what he said, if there was a war, she would have studied it in the Academy. "There were no wars that dwarves were involved in, not even the Kharlan War. And besides, there would have to be at least some evidence that this actually happened." As Sheena stated her point, she walked forward a step, and the seemingly solid marble collapsed into a pit of basilisk, she would have been eaten if Lloyd hadn't grabbed her as she was falling. Sheena then started to blush as she was set down where she was standing before she triggered another trap.

"Doesn't this prove my point?" Lloyd asked Sheena, not sarcastically, but curiously, like he really wanted to know.

"Well, why would dwarves want to hide a war? It doesn't make any sense…" Sheena retorted, not daring to make another move on the marble.

"Dwarves are secretive creatures, that is why most of them live underground instead of above, and it would have been an embarrassment to them because they try to remain neutral." Lloyd was trying to spot anymore traps that might be triggered.

"Even if that was true, there are no such things as Dark Elves, there are no Mizuho records of them ever existing," Sheena was as stubborn as Lloyd when she was stating her opinion. She was going to try and cross again, just to prove that the marble must have just been a weak piece, not a trap. She stepped confidently on another piece of marble, and nothing happened. "See, it was just a coincidence".

"Well, maybe Dark Elves are extinct, wouldn't that explain everything?" Lloyd was worried about what might happen to Sheena, what could happen if the story Dirk told him was true. _Maybe she's right, it could have just been a weak piece of marble, and I suppose dwarves may have had a basilisk problem at one time…_ As Lloyd was pondering this, Sheena took another step, and a stone pillar fell right ahead of Sheena, where she was about to step. She jumped back in time, almost knocking into Lloyd.

"Must have stonites or something" Sheena let out a weak chuckle, she would stay by what she thought till the end.

"Sheena, I know I'm right about this, so we have to be careful, or something bad could happen." Lloyd started out saying this confidently, but it faltered toward the end. "According to dad, the Dark Elves took over most of the mines, until they were finally pushed back in one final outburst. So, logically, they would have riddled the place with traps to harm the dwarves." Lloyd took a step forward, and, as if to prove his point, a dart flew out from a hidden panel of the wall. He easily dodged it.

"I'll listen, for now. So, who wants to go first?" Sheena asked Lloyd, even though it was obvious that he would want to go first, until he got tired of it.

"I can go first!" Lloyd replied enthusiastically, and quickly ran across the marble, to the other side, all the while darts were shooting, pillars were falling down, and the floor was cracking beneath him. "See, easy as…" Lloyd was going to say pie, but making pie isn't exactly that easy. "As making a sandwich"

"Well, here goes nothing…" Sheena proceeded in following Lloyd, but even though Lloyd had triggered most traps, there were a few that were still active. She dodged these with ease, but it tired her. Catching on fire had taken most of her strength.

"Sheena, are you okay? We could always take a break…" Lloyd was worried about her, she wasn't normally like this.

"I'm fine, we should hurry, last time I was in a mine, I was almost eaten by a giant skeleton…" Sheena's mind wandered off as she remembered how she narrowly escaped the giant 4 armed skeleton.

**At the End of the Tunnel which led to the Mainland**

"We made it!" Lloyd was happy, the end was in site, and snow was falling and light was visible. Sheena, on the other hand, was exhausted. She was almost; eaten alive by a basilisk, set on fire (again), fell into a hole filled with spears, torn apart by a killer rabbit, darted, flattened by a stone column, and impaled on a stalactite. Fortunately, none of that happened.

"No skeletons" Sheena muttered, she was obviously relieved, and the Giant must have given her nightmares for a while. "Let's go!" she said in a louder voice, she couldn't fail now, not after all that.

"I'll go first" Lloyd volunteered again, it seems he enjoys near-death experiences. He also wanted to get out, the air was stale and thick with carbon-dioxide, so he and Sheena could suffocate at any moment. He moved quickly to the other side unharmed, it seemed there were no traps at the end.

"Here goes noth…everything." Sheena changed what she said at the last moment, if she collapsed, it was likely she would suffocate before Lloyd could get her out of the tunnel. She used the last of her energy to move forward to the other side, and, because I'm so evil, she triggered the only trap in this part of the tunnel. A dart flew from the panel which was hidden in the rock, hitting her arm and poisoning her. She managed to get to the outside.

"Sheena!" Lloyd was extremely worried about her, she had turned green. Of course, she wasn't going to ask for help, she rarely asked for help, and even when it was offered, she declined; she had some need to prove herself.

"I'm fine Lloyd, I don't need any help." She told him before she tripped, only to be caught by Lloyd. She would have blushed, if she wasn't green.

"Whether you want help or not, you're getting it." Lloyd actually sounded serious, something you don't hear everyday. Sheena was out of energy, but she wasn't going to have Lloyd carry her, she'd be embarrassed for a long time if that happened. After much difficulty because of the ice, she got up.

"I'll just use you as a cane," she told Lloyd, who looked at her in doubt. He suspected she was tired; all she had to do was ask if they could set camp there.

"Flanoir should be east of here." Lloyd guessed, they had come from the direction of Melekito so it should be east. They started walking slowly in the snow, their footprints were quickly covered. After about half an hour of walking, a blizzard began, not just a blizzard though, it was a hailizard. The hail pelted the two as they futilely attempted to get to Flanoir.

"Lloyd, I need to tell you something." Sheena interrupted the eerie silence that was occurring. Lloyd stopped and turned to face Sheena.

"What is it Sheena? But couldn't it wait for Flanoir?" Lloyd asked her, he wanted her healed quickly, and that could only be done in Flanoir.

_I don't think we will make it to Flanoir_ Sheena was thinking. Not like she would say that, it would be giving up, something she hadn't done for years. So she wanted Lloyd to know something that he seemed to totally ignore. "Lo-Lloyd, I need to tell you that, I lov…" She started to say stuttering, but couldn't finish because at that moment, she was hit on the head by a piece of hail the size of a pineapple. She hit the ground, no longer conscious.

"Sheena! No…" Lloyd thought she was dead, that the poison had weakened her so much that that had been the final health point. But it wasn't, he didn't know that though. _Maybe Raine could heal her_ was his thought. He would have picked her up and carried her, if he hadn't been hit by a murder of Flanoirian Swallows. As he fell to the ground, he saw a figure, and heard a howl before losing consciousness.

* * *

Bane: Done, the next chapter will be full of humor and mostly about Noishe.

Anti: Bane, aren't you supposed to be dead?

Bane: I came back

Anti: Why?

GM: Because he is going to be in one of my other stories.

Anti: Shouldn't you finish this one before planning other ones.

GM: No.


	7. Just when you thought it couldn't get mo...

**Responding to Reviewers:**

**Crystal Tears:** Thanks.

**Wyvern's Darkness:** Don't worry; Zelos is going to get a good bashing _very_ soon... And yes there will be a fluffy Sheloyd ending.

**Mizu: **I'm writing as fast as I can

**Lloyd (Irving) Aurion: **You can't give Sheena and Lloyd a respite last chapter, because of what's going to in this chapter. Sorry if it seems weird. And I never had and never will have any intention of going to…Colloyd, or Shelos, I never did understand Shelos, I mean Sheena HATES Zelos. Wait, how do you know where I am? Which character told you? WAS IT ZELOS?

**Zelda's Fox 38: **Spoofs, the required ingredient for humor. The rabbit is one of my favorite characters, after Tim of course.

**Saiko Ninja:** 6 reviews!? Wow! I'll answer each. I tried to make each character how they act, but sometimes it doesn't work. The shampoo thing was a wild-card idea. I'm sure you could write humor, you just need to bash Zelos a bit. He didn't want to wake her up because of last time; the end of the review is funny, spoof of MasterCard. FF VI is my 2nd favorite Final Fantasy, after IV. Zelos wasn't kissing Raine out of the blue, he heard the words "_my chosen one_" so he figured it meant him, and Colette…well I can't really explain her. The figure is someone everyone knows, and either hates completely, or is one of their favorite characters. It was a pineapple because that's what Sheena likes to cook with, and thanks for all the reviews!

Bane: Now to the more humorous part of the story, appearance of Regal.

Anti: Why are we so mean to certain characters?

GM: Because we are using the humor known as "Funny-ouch". Where we have characters get hurt or almost get hurt, for the sake of humor.

Regal: Why me?

GM: Because you are the most boring character in the game who only plays the indirect purpose of having Presea join.

Minion: Okay Regal, time to go.

Anti: **Disclaimer: Green Magi does not own Tales of Sympthonia or Namco. Or the words: Ecky- ecky- ecky- ecky- pikang- zoop- boing- goodem- zoo- owli- zhiv'**

Bane: Enjoy the chapter, humor in the form of Spoofs are coming.

GM: Ignore Bane; he has to be the craziest character I ever thought up.

Bane: I resent that.

Anti: Now on to the story.

* * *

**Flanoir General Store; the Tale of Regal**

Regal was trying to buy a cookbook; unfortunately, the store had been closed for a special occasion. So he was forced to search the streets for a cookbook, and suffice to say, it wasn't going well. He spotted an open market, and walked toward it.

"You there, old lady, do you happen to carry, cookbooks." He asked the old lady who was minding the stand like a statue.

"…." Was her reply.

"I'm looking for a cookbook, one that has some native recipes; do you know where I could find some?" He asked her again.

"…." She again replied.

"I assure you I'm a Master Chef; I just want to see if there are any unique recipes of this region." He tried to get a response out of her, with her still being Miss Statue.

"…", Was her answer.

"Fine then, if you could move…" Regal asked her, and she finally responded.

"There are no cookbooks here, now I suggest you leave." Was her cold reply as an angry mob chased out a colony of swallows. "You heard me, now go!"

"I am going to stay here until you move." Regal wasn't President of the Lorenzo Company for nothing, he took a few business chances, and won.

"So be it," was her frosty reply, as they stood opposite of each other, neither going to move….

**Meanwhile**

Genis wasn't exactly getting better; it seemed that his condition was preserved. He was still pink, so he looked like a mini Zelos with shorter hair. Zelos had left before Raine could say (or do) anything. Raine herself was checking through all the books she had to find a way to cure Genis' hair, there was no way possible that her brother was going to look, in any way, like Zelos. Presea was carving a figurine of Noishe; it was like a stress-reliever for her.

"Profess…Raine, do you think Genis will be alright…. I mean, return to maximum health before our Rehairds are fixed?" Presea rushed the last part to cover up for the first, she couldn't sound emotional. If she did, then she would have to talk normal all the time, instead of her usual monotone voice.

"WHO DARE DISTURB MY SLUMBER!?" Raine looked crazy, quoting from dragons from a distant past. She _really_ wanted to leave Flanoir, even being around frozen water freaked her out.

"Raine, you were not sleeping," Presea stated the oh so obvious. "But sleep is necessary for good health; you have not slept for… 20 hours, 13 minutes, 87 seconds, 23 milliseconds, and 2.879654 nanoseconds. Any second now you should…" she didn't get a chance to finish because Raine suddenly collapsed to the floor from sleep deprivation.

Now Presea had to face one of the most difficult questions ever to be questioned by a 12 year old pink haired girl, should she put Raine in the girls room to sleep, or let her stay here. Decisions, decisions; she decided, in her uninfinite wisdom, to put her in the girls room. This seemed like a good choice, except for the fact that she had closed the door to the center room, and had left the all important key inside.

"Now what do I do? I could break down the door, but then I could be arrested… Or I could wait for Genis to get up, and open the door". The second choice seemed safer, but riskier. If Raine awakened before Genis… _No Presea, don't think like that, everything will be fine… or turn into a disaster… I'll just wait here outside the door then. But what if people stared? Wait, when have **I** started caring what people thought of me?_ And to save my readers the boredom, let's just say the rest of her thoughts were like this, as we move on back to Regal.

**Back to the Tale of Regal**

Regal and the old lady had not moved during the entire time. It was the staring contest of the century, neither blinking nor backing down, not even while a dog started playing the saxophone behind Regal. Then came the Master of Disaster himself, Zelos Wilder. He still had a limp, but had found something to cover his eye up with, so he looked like a pirate with no wooden leg.

"Hey Reeg, how are you doing" Zelos asked his companion, who wouldn't look at him, but spoke all the same.

"I'm trying to buy a cookbook, now, would you mind leaving?" Regal asked him in a tone that was on the verge of impatience. As soon as he said this, he regretted it, now Zelos was just going to stay and make things worse, in this case, much **much** worse.

"Well my old chum, I believe I could help you out here." Zelos turned to the old lady, causing her to…blink. "Dear, would you mind moving for my friend here, maybe you don't recognize me but I'm…" Before Zelos could continue, the old lady slapped him.

"HOW DARE YOU! CALLING ME A DEER!" She had obviously misunderstood, well, it was only half her fault, Zelos should have said 'my dear'.

"That's it, move now or Regal and I shall say, Ecky- ecky- ecky- ecky- pikang- zoop- boing- goodem- zoo- owli- zhiv!" He told her threateningly, not noticing that Regal was honorable, and would never say those words to a lady.

"NEVER! I WILL NEVER MOVE!" The old lady was in an idiom now, nothing was going to move her. "DO YOUR WORST!"

"Ecky- ecky- ecky- ecky- pikang- zoop- boing- goodem- zoo- owli- zhiv" Zelos said it again, and the lady flinched, not much, but still flinched, so he tried it again. "Ecky- ecky- ecky- ecky- pikang- zoop- boing- goodem- zoo- owli- zhiv" Regal couldn't take it anymore, he had to do something, no matter how annoying the old lady was, no one deserved this. "Ecky- ecky- ecky- ecky- pikang- zoop- boing- goodem- zoo- owli- zhiv" Zelos said it again.

"Zelos, please stop saying…" he was trying to remain calm, but he lost it, unfortunately for him. "ECKY-ECKY-ECKY-ECKY-PIKANG-ZOOP-BOING-GOODEM-ZOO-OWLI-ZHIV!!!" The mob of villagers was just passing through then, as luck would have it.

"You there, stop saying…those words to that old woman." The random villager from before demanded.

"Well, I, um…" Regal was at a loss for words, but as he saw Zelos trying to escape again, he spoke again. "It was HIS idea" he knew that he would get in trouble as well, but at least Zelos did too.

"Here we only have one punishment for saying those words…" Here the villager took a dramatic pause, "We spin the Wheel of Judgment and whosoever it lands upon decides thy punishment." And with that, they brought forth the Wheel and had the strongest of the mob spin it.

**Colette and Noishe**

"Blah blah blah, blah blah blah." That was what it seemed to the Wonder Chef that Colette was saying, he saw her mouth open and shut, and open and shut, but all he heard was 'blah'. _Will she ever SHUT UP? How can anyone ever remain sane listening to this? I'm already running late…_

"And that is why you should be polite to everyone, okay?" Colette finished her boring lecture. "Now what was that recipe that you were trying to tell me?" she asked him politely, trying to make a point.

"The recipe…" The Wonder Chef had been taken from his thoughts of what could happen because he was late, to see that she was finally done. "The recipe of…ESCAPE" With that, he raised the Almighty Cooking Fork, and was teleported to Cooking Isle.

"We'll meet again chef, just you wait…" Colette said to herself, causing a few people to stare. Noticing this, she decided to keep all threatening thoughts to herself. She decided to leave the Church, she had been there for a very long time, and that might make the others worry about her. As she was stepping out, a familiar figure came to meet her.

"Bark! Bark!" Noishe couldn't tell her in human, never bothered to learn it. The translation is _Colette, I found Sheena and Lloyd, follow me!_

"What's that Noishe? Old man Bob is trapped in a well?" Colette asked, so far off the real message that I cannot fully express the impatience of Noishe.

"Whine, Bark!" Noishe tried again, tugging on her dress softly. The translation this time is: _That is so off that I cannot express my impatience, we have to save Lloyd and Sheena!_

"OH, you either want to play fetch, or you know where Lloyd and Sheena are!" Colette was hit by a sudden bolt of knowledge, which only happens maybe, once in the entire game.

"Whine, bark, wooolf" Noishe barked out sarcastically, he had been saying that from the beginning, and it took her forever to figure it out. Translation: _No, I'd much rather play fetch with you than save Lloyd and Sheena._

"Ok, then." Colette no longer had the shock from the bolt of knowledge, so she was back to that annoying, overly optimistic girl that we all know. "Let's go!" And so, what should have happened in the third chapter was happening now.

**At the site were Sheena and Lloyd were**

Colette had ridden Noishe most of the way, it was faster than walking, and she didn't want to fly in the hail that had just started an hour or so ago. She spotted a murder of swallows flying ahead of her, toward the place where Noishe was taking her.

With her angelic powers of eyesight, she saw two figures far ahead of her, and one had twin swords. She knew it was them, who else wore two swords? "Faster Noishe, I can see them!" She asked the Protozoan, who, for once, obeyed her. As they got closer, she saw one of the figures fall, and the other get swamped by the swallows. They were close enough that Colette got off Noishe, who could get there faster without her weight.

"HOWL!!!!!!!" Noishe cried as heraced toward the fallen warrior and ninja.

* * *

GM: This took a long time, not because of its length, but because I have a big test tomorrow and I'm trying to study. 

Bane: I told you there would be spoofs.

Anti: Not very many…

GM: So in your review, wish me good luck, or I'll send an army of Dark Elves.

Anti: Don't listen to him, stress has taken over his mind.

Bane: Well, listen to the part about reviewing.


	8. Sheloyd

**Responding to Reviewers:**

**Ashley Regal:** I don't really mind spelling, thanks.

**Wyvern's Darkness:** I know, but Dark Elves were the first enemy I ever had trouble with, back in the days of Final Fantasy. I can't burn Colette, sorry, and I agree the programmers should let you choose with Kratos ending too. Is your name from FFIV Wyvern? The little brother of Bahamut?

**Mizu: **Last chapter for this, though there will be a sequal.

**Lloyd (Irving) Aurion:** I can't burn Colette, maybe in the sequal. But you should try writing a chapter fiction, too many one shot stories, they need chapter stories. Thanks for saying it was better, Zelos will have plenty of torture... later.

**Zelda's Fox 38:** No Vanna White, I'm sorry. I had to put in the Knights who until recently said 'Ni'. I really don't like Zelos, though Regal isn't my favorite character either.

**Kratos, Protozoan Master!!!!:** I'm typing but school has gotten in the way, so sorry for the delay.

**CrystalTears:** Thanks for the review. I'm writing more, don't worry. Thanks for the good luck.

**Sakura-chan79:** Really? Well your fiction seemed more S/L than C/L. No Kratos, he's to busy nursing his wounds.

GM: This is the final chapter of _Surviving Flanoir_

Anti: Except for the alternate ending

GM: Well, I'm making that separate from this; it isn't very humorous you see, more tragic really.

Bane: And this chapter contains amounts of bashing, mostly to one character

Anti: I'll do the last **disclaimer: Green Magi does not own Tales of Sympthonia or Namco**

Bane: This fills the romance part of the story, finally, after about 6 chapters of humor.

**Now, Onto the story**

Emotions are strange things, happiness and sadness could combine at once, as well as anxiety and relief, and they can become several different things at once. When emotions that are opposite combine, the one feeling them are often filled with conflicting thoughts, this is what was happening to Noishe as he stood above the fallen Ninja and Swordsman.

_Lloyd! I'm so glad I found you before…No, don't think like that, Lloyd, you need to be more careful, I'm over 10,000 years old and I have never seen such stupid actions!... Except of course the time some idiot thought of flying an Ice Cream Rehaird over a cliff, the poor guy never had a chance… _Thoughts such as this filled Noishe's head as he tried to awaken Lloyd, who wouldn't respond.

Colette was flying over to them, her wings melting the hail as they fell through them. As she landed next to Noishe, (after folding her wings) she had an anxious look upon her normally smiling face. She saw burn marks, mud, ice, small holes, bite marks, and a number of scratches on the ninja's purple outfit. Lloyd was in better shape, just some beak marks from the swallows, who were no where in site.

"Noishe," Colette turned to the Protozoan, who was nudging Lloyd, attempting to awake him. "We should get them to Flanoir as fast as possible; Sheena is already in bad shape." At this, Colette acquired the famed title of "Pointer of the Obvious", famous only because no one had been so incredibly oblivious like that for over 3,000 years. "Do you think you could carry both of them?"

"Whine, whine, bark, whine" Noishe responded, sarcastically once more this time meaning; _No, I can't carry them, I've only carried all eight of you at once, so why should I be able to carry two humans? _Noishe felt another presence nearby, in fact, several presences nearby.

"Okay then," Colette responded cheerily, still having no idea what Noishe was yapping about, as she was about to pick up one of her fallen friends. But she stopped as she spotted, 9 yards away from her, one of the most terrifying things she ever saw… (View is magnified by 900) A Microscopic Spider! "AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" She screeched and it attracted more spiders, bigger spiders, that don't need a microscope to see. "OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! IT'S A SPIDER COLONY!!!!!!" Her wings burst out and she took off to the sky, only flying about 12 feet off the ground.

"Bark, bark, whine" Noishe tried to reason with the girl, but it was no use. The keen eyes of the Protozoan caught sight of one of the spiders moving toward Lloyd. Noishe, with bared teeth, jumped at the overgrown spider, and lets just say all that was left was some blood on the snow.

"Noishe, I have a…Idea" Colette had an idea, the normal sign that an apocalyptic meteor was going to destroy the entire world, but this is a humor fic, not tragedy, so that doesn't happen. "I can carry Sheena and Lloyd from the air and you can defeat all those nasty, evil, backstabbing, web weaving, horrible spiders." She said it like she had discovered the secret of Alchemy, not just some idea that would work.

"Whine" Noishe said in an impressed tone, meaning; _Wow, you actually figured out something for yourself, who would have thought._

Colette grabbed Sheena in one hand and Lloyd in the other, and lifted off, temporarily struggling with their combined weight. She flew around a bit, getting used to balancing, but in one, horrible, horrible wrong turn, she almost dropped Lloyd. She flew around a bit more, while Noishe tore up (to put it politely) the spiders below.

"Okay, Noishe, I'm ready to fly to Flanoir" She said enthusiastically, not aware that two of the party members were about to have one of the worst experiences of their lives,

"HOOOOOOOOOOWL!" Noishe cried out, running at the angelic girls pace, and destroying any type of enemy that got in the way.

**Back to the Inn of Flanoir**

_So I just locked Genis alone in the room, with no key, and he has no idea what is happening. _Presea had finished her carving of Noishe, and was starting to pace outside of the three rooms. The carpet was starting to fray where she was walking, so you could see her cat prints on the carpet.

"Let's see, waking up Raine without obtaining mortal wounds, 0.0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000003, chance of getting Genis out without accidentally waking her up 49... Not even an equal chance…" Presea was muttering to herself as she started to devise a plan to rescue Genis from the peril she put him in. As she was debating this, she noticed the seemingly empty pot of seafood soup Raine had tried to make.

Another guest of the hotel came by, and saw the pot and carving laying directly in his way. "Excuse me little girl, can you move your toys?" He asked her, as if he was talking to an eight year old.

"Of course…" Presea responded in a monotone, reaching for the pot, inside she saw it wasn't quite empty. The man moved past muttering something about immature kids.

The pot still had a few ounces of seafood stew left in it, not that she was hungry, and she dumped her portion of the soup out the window when she was eating it. But the soup had burned the stone street, how the Professor managed to make lethal food without poison, the world will never know. But, it gave Presea an idea; she could burn the hinges off the door, and then glue them back on after she had the key.

She moved toward the door, and carefully poured the acidic soup over the hinges. It worked; apparently, the Ph level of the soup was 0.00052, a very powerful acid. She stepped into the room, and thankfully, Genis was still where he was when she left, but was softly snoring.

Just then, a knock was heard at the front door, and as she went down to open it, this time taking the room key with her, she was shocked to see Noishe covered in blue spider blood, and Colette carrying Lloyd and Sheena. Noishe stayed out and started rolling around in the snow to get the blood off, while Colette stepped in, Presea quickly shut the door to keep the cold out.

"Hey Presea, guess what I found!" Colette asked her cheerily, acknowledging the 2 warriors she was holding. "Noishe led me to them, and they don't seem in the best of health, I'm tired." Colette said it all in a rush. "Would you mind holding them?"

"No, I do not mind" Presea slipped back to monotone, and grabbed hold of Lloyd in one hand, and Sheen in the other. "I'll go put them in them back, and you can wake the Professor so she could heal them." Presea ordered Colette, then, before Colette could protest, Presea went up the flight of stairs.

"Okay, I hope the Professor is in a good mood…" Famous last words came for Colette as she walked into the room where the Professor was sleeping. The quickest way to wake a person up is to dump a bucket of cold water on their head, which is what Colette was going to do, forgetting that Raine had a pathological fear of water.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!! WATER! GET IT OFF! GET IT OFF!" Raine let out a scream that could wake the dead, but there was no dead to be awakened. After calming down, she had Colette explain, and she grabbed her staff, and followed Colette to heal Lloyd and Sheena.

**At the Town Square**

The Wheel of Judgment was finally slowing down, the anticipation was immense. Regal was playing a game of solitaire, while Zelos tried to weasel his way out by flirting, it wasn't working, the last time anyone had heard of the Chosen there was 100 years ago. When the wheel stopped it landed on 'V.P'.

"So we're being judged by a Vice President?" Zelos asked the crowd who were shocked at what it landed on.

"No, here V.P. stands for… Village Pyro," the random villager from before said as the Pyro came forth.

"Heheheheheheheheheh… I say that they are covered in Kirima juice, lit on fire, and catapulted out of town." The pyro was happy; he got to set something on fire.

"The punishment will be fulfilled as soon as we build a catapult." The villager announced.

"It really doesn't have to be like this… We could just forget it happened." Zelos tried his logic, only to have it fall on deaf ears.

**10 p.m. The Inn**

Sheena had recovered first, and decided to get out of her scorched, bitten, clothes. She found her "Successor" outfit, and left to get changed. After she showered and changed, she decided to go for a walk, it was a lovely night out, a full moon with no clouds to block the view. She just wanted to take a break, after what had happened, she needed one.

After walking through the curiously empty streets, she stopped at the spot where she and Lloyd had talked that night before they charged the Tower. The memories came back to her quickly, though she tried to get rid of them. The only thing different was Flanoir had recently added a bench, so she sat down, lost in her thoughts.

(Now to Genis)

After getting up, Genis had wearily gone to the door. He was still pink, and that bothered him, he didn't enjoy pink very much, only for his Katz outfit. Opening the door, he saw Presea leaning against the wall drowsily.

This distracted him so much, that he didn't see the Noishe figurine, and tripped and fell down the flight of stairs, leaving a pink imprint whenever he bounced on the floor.

Awakening Presea, who immediately saw what was happening judging from the pink Genis imprints, ran down the staircase. She found him in the middle of the floor of the lobby, in a daze. She tenderly picked him up, and headed back up the stairs, hoping the manager was colorblind to pink. But that didn't matter to her at that moment; all that mattered was the little half-elf in her arms.

(Lloyd)

Recovering after Genis, he noticed he was in an inn, not the snow, but an inn. He decided to take a shower, falling into a cave isn't exactly hygienic. After taking a shower and dressing into his "Nobleman" costume, he decided to take a walk.

He noticed Presea was taking Genis up the stairs, and he decided not to ask about it. He didn't want to annoy anyone who could wield an axe. He decided to go view the city from where it had the best view, which was where Sheena was at that time. He had a lot to ponder about from the event that happened, and he needed somewhere quite.

When he got there, he noticed that Sheena was also there. That gave him a shock; he didn't expect Sheena to awaken first after what had happened. He sat down next to her, snapping her out of her dream world.

"Lloyd! You're awake, that's good." Sheena told him, blushing that she didn't hear him even after all her ninja training.

"I'm glad to see you're okay Sheena, I was worried about you…" Lloyd spoke the last part very softly, but because of their close proximity, she heard him anyway.

"That was quite an adventure, wasn't it?" She asked him, her face losing the blush.

"It was…" Something was bothering Lloyd, every time he and Sheena were together, his stomach felt like there was a pit in it. He had heard that this was the first sign of falling in love, but he denied it since Raine had been cooking in an effort to improve, so he just blamed it on her terrible cooking. But he hadn't eaten her cooking recently, so he had no excuse, he had to face it; he was in love with Sheena.

"Is something wrong?" Sheena asked after a pause, you could see the concern in her eyes.

"I have to tell you something" Lloyd took a deep breath and faced Sheena, "I love you…"

"W-what?" Sheena stuttered, she loved Lloyd, but she never thought he loved her.

"I love you Sheena," the words were foreign to his mouth, but the only way to describe his feelings.

Sheena was in total shock, this had to be a dream, but it wasn't. After moments which seemed like an eternity, she answered, "I love you too." She was glad to finally tell him, the truth was eating her up inside. She then kissed him lightly.

Lloyd was also in shock, he had no idea Sheena like him, and after all, she did try to kill him when they had first met. The kiss made his heart stop for a few seconds, then he returned it more… I'm not going to use passionately, everyone uses that word (takes out thesaurus) how about…magnitude! He returned the kiss with greater magnitude, as two flaming objects flew (or catapulted) by.

**Zelos & Regal**

After being set on fire and catapulted, they landed on the rocky beach on the edge of the continent. Regal, thanks to the handcuffs, didn't fall in. Zelos, on the other hand, fell into the freezing water. The shampoo attracted all sorts of carnivorous fish.

"OMG! IT'S A RED SEAMONKY" Zelos screamed as the lethal piranha-like sea creature attacked him.

"To help or not to help, that is the question" Regal was no longer on fire, the snow saw to that. He was debating to risk his life to save Zelos, or to leave Zelos on his own. He decided to leave Zelos on his own; he needs to learn to take responsibility.

"NO!!! DON'T LEAVE!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAACKKKKKKKK! IT'S A… LEECH! GET IT OFF OF ME!!!" Zelos was trying to attract attention, but no one was paying attention, because no one was there. So he had to get out by himself.

(I'm going to spare you all the trouble of reading about how Zelos got out.)

When Zelos had finally got out, he was a mess, bleeding in several places, and not in a very good mood. His hair healed him because of the gel enough to get back to the inn at Flanoir. So he was recovered. (I can hear the boos already)

In light of all the events, it appeared that they hadn't noticed that they could use magic again. The machine had worn off.

**Now ending the Story**

GM: There, finally done.

Anti: Now to work on the AE

GM: Of course

Bane: And then the sequel

GM: I'm sorry if you have a story up and I haven't read it, I haven't been on for a few days.

Bane: The lines aren't working either...


End file.
